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Tuesday, February 26, 2013

Musing Mondays ~ MS Word Can't Have Ice Cream

February 25, 2013
Monday, 11:05 pm

Weight:  Holding Steady


Coffee Consumption: 1 cup of Cafe Mocha

Chocolate Report: 
Let's talk about ice cream... chocolate ice cream.


musing:  deep in thought; contemplative.


For one thing, it's software.  For another, it's not well-behaved enough to get dessert.  In fact, it's going to bed without dinner tonight.  I might not even let it have breakfast either at this point.

This is "finals" week for me in ENG 226.  That means our final creative writing project is due.  It's a writer's portfolio.  I've never compiled one before, and most of the examples I have found are online portfolios.  So, in a lot of ways I'm winging it, and praying I get it right.  

When I write, I use Scrivener.  I like Scrivener.  It does all that tricky export and compile stuff for me.  I don't have to think about margins, or spacing, or page numbers.  I just write, hit save, and later when I am ready choose to shoot it out into a form that is compatible for outside software.
My final project is being composed in MS Word.  I've been fighting with it most of the night.  All I need are page numbers.  The page numbers need to start with the number "1" but not until page 3.  In other words my page three is my page one, because of a title page and table of contents.  I know how to start numbering on page "2" by using the "use different first page" button, sure... but how to do this with page 3 as page 1?  No one knows.
Okay, someone knows.  They made a "how to" post online.  I've read it a hundred times, attempted it 99.5 times, and then...

Okay, I facedesked it enough to desire chocolate ice cream, but stopped prior to full on unconsciousness.  I'm convinced MS Word is software straight from the bowels of hell and Satan is the software developer!

Not having page numbers can't possibly damage my 4.0 gpa too much.  Right?

*Dives face first into bowl of "it's all going to be okay..." covered in chocolate syrup.*

I've called in my blue monkey sister, and  Fellow MS Word hater-- the one and only glitter-fabulous author Stephanie Karfelt!  We are tackling the monster behind the scenes...  Not because we have nothing better to do, but because we refuse to be defeated by the demon!  Writers are a stubborn breed of the species, "I must make it work", genus "or DIE trying".  Stephanie is well armed though...

Being blue means you never have to slay software demons alone.

It took dear Stephanie about 5 minutes to figure out the problem.  A problem I definitely caused, but have not a clue how.  Headers and footers everywhere.  Wow, you mean those don't come standard on every MS Word page?  Who knew!?!?  Total shout outs to my hero Stephanie for her help!  I'm off to battle the beast, remove all headers and footers, and try one more time...

Did I mention how much I love Scrivener?

What's your "cure" for when things won't work your way?
Do you dive into ice cream or something else?

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This daily dose of DM brought to you by a very irritated but determined blue monkey!

*Down With Word -and- US Air*

Thanks Stephanie!


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